I am all alone. Nobody in sight. I know exactly who I want. But why does love blind us? Why does it have to be so hard? Why does a simple phone call make me happy? I love one person. One. And I want another one.

They say good things come to those who wait. I have waited, haven’t I? Haven’t I waited long enough? Is it because I am afraid? Is it because I don’t want to have sex with someone the moment I see them?

Is there something about me that people don’t like? You don’t know what you have until you have lost it.

A little acknowledgement is all I ever need. A simple phone call from the right person is the only thing that I need. Right now at least.

But I can’t even get that. I doubt he will call. He says he loves me. But does he? Is that a ulterior motive? Yeah, probably. I always try to see the good in people. I always try.

I really wish that guy wasn’t with him. I wish I DIDN’T TRY TO LATE!!! Why did I listen to him? Goddamn.

He is so nice. He is honest. He is cute. And I want him. I really do.

I am on top of a parking garage and a security guard came up and asked me what I was doing. I just said, “sitting. I like it up here.”

“I do too. I stay up here all the time.”
“It’s so peaceful. If it’s against the rules, I’ll leave.”
“It is but don’t worry about it. Just don’t stay up here all night.”
“Thank you very much.”

This happened after I started crying. I guess there is life on this planet after all.

I have no one.